To be yourself or not to be yourself? What a nerve wracking experience not knowing how to act in a new relationship.
Should you totally show the person exactly who you are or laugh at their terrible jokes or hold back? So many questions that need answers, although there is sometimes no formula to how these things work, there are possibly some commonalities.
Here is some expert advice on how we can go about acting on new relationships.
According to PsychAlive there are basic things that can help you navigate a new relationship.
The process of getting to know one another
Do not be scared of being vulnerable. It can be scary at first to think of opening up to someone or letting someone really get to know us on a more intimate level. Fears will naturally arise, as will the pain of past hurt.
PsychAlive recommends that the best thing we can do is to be aware of these reactions. Notice when they arise, but stand firm in our determination to stay open and be vulnerable to what may happen next.
Quit playing games
You know how we can sometimes be testing someone every chance you get to see if they are going to pass your tests. It’s not fair on them and it’s not fair on you, this means you’re robbing yourself and them to a chance to get to know each other.
For example “Don’t answer his text. Don’t let him think you’re desperate” or “Don’t call her for at least three days. Make her think there are other people interested in you.”
Be Present
Live in the moment.
Celebrity matchmaker Carmelia Ray shares with Brides some practical things you should be mindful of:
- Being jealous is a red flag, refrain from being needy.
- Don’t give up time with family and friends just to prioritize the new person in your life, pace yourself.
- Listen and learn to communicate with your partner, remember people are different.
- Bragging is a huge turn off, it’s not necessary especially if it’s meant to impress your partner.
- Actions should speak more than words, don’t be easily excited without seeing someone’s true colors.
Also see: Small romantic gestures that help keep the spark alive in relationships
