Growing up with a toxic mother can be an incredibly challenging experience for a girl child, shaping the way she views herself and the world around her. The constant emotional strain, criticism, or lack of support can leave deep scars that carry into adulthood.
However, surviving such a dynamic is not only possible—it’s also a journey of self-discovery and healing. By learning to set boundaries, seeking support, and focusing on self-worth, it’s possible to overcome the pain and build a life rooted in strength and self-love.
The TalkSpace publication states that a toxic parent is a parent who exhibits harmful behaviours that undermine a child’s self-worth, stability, and mental well-being. These behaviours are said to be overt or subtle, such as verbal belittlement, emotional manipulation, or physical intimidation.
According to the above source, there are different types of toxic parents, some can be dismissive, and overlook their child’s feelings and needs, while helicopter parents micromanage their child’s life, stifling independence and problem-solving skills.
To cope with a toxic mother, Psychology Today states that is best to work on healing wounds and become a healed woman. It is further stated that healing from toxic abuse takes time, but the first step is to make a decision not to tolerate abuse or damage self-esteem.
Setting boundaries is said to be crucial for healing from toxic abuse. The above source also mentions that you assess the specific issues or abuses and consider ways to set boundaries, if the mother is controlling over your life, stop attempting to achieve her validation and support.
“Whatever you do, try not to become reactive or angry as this will enable her to justify her toxic behaviour.”
Psych Central suggest that it is essential to stop trying to please your toxic mom and focus on what you can control, such as your responses, choices, and behavior. It advised that you are always on guard, trust your instincts and only share what feels comfortable and safe with them.
The above source further suggests that you always be assertive about issues that matter to you, but acknowledge that your parents may not understand your point of view.
