Success – in everything you attempt – requires confidence. Often, as parents, we tend to leave the emotional health of our children up to teachers and society, then we go on to blame ourselves when they begin to display unruly and defiant behaviour. Below are seven basic tips on how to raise confident, yet respectful, kids.
Children learn what they live
It’s important to realise that children do as you do, and not as you say. Your child will struggle to gain confidence if they see you treating yourself as less than what you are. Watch your behaviour around your child – be kind and loving to yourself. It won’t only make it easier to teach your child how to imitate you, but it will also seem natural to your child.
Open communication lines
You will not be able to impart any knowledge to your kid if they can’t talk to you. Have one-on-one conversations; show interest in their daily life and gradually grow your chats till they involve one another’s feelings. Teach your child to rely on you.
Mind your tone
It’s natural to get angered by your child when they do wrong. but never display fits of rage in front them. Try to remain calm, this way, your child will see love, self-control and emotional maturity in play, which are important traits of confident people. Talking down to your children will result in saying the wrong things, making them fear you. Explain to them how their behaviour makes you feel; remember that some words can never be unsaid.
Validate and affirm
Be the first person to tell your child that you love and value them; this way, you’ll prevent them from seeking affirmation from outside. Make them feel special and beautiful by complimenting and praising them for the right things.
Household chores, going to a school dance unsupervised or obeying curfews without being told to do so can boost your child’s confidence.
Control and teach
Try to curb negative influences through frank conversations. Control access to things like pornography, substance abuse and explicit violence. But, this doesn’t mean that you need to be overly strict about some of the things they can surf on the internet or watch on TV – just explain to them why you are being cautious and protective.
Feeling loved inspires them to try be responsible, practice self-respect and learn positive behaviour, so love your child as best as only you can and watch them flourish.