Kungi speaks out: when women lead financially
South Africa found itself in a lively debate this week after reality star and digital creator Anika “Kungi” Dambuza revealed she was the primary financial provider in her marriage to Sihle Dambuza. Her confession on The Real City Makoti quickly went viral, sparking conversations across timelines and comment sections about masculinity, partnership, and the evolving role of women in households.
“Why does talking about being a female breadwinner make people uncomfortable? Why is it automatically assumed that it will bruise a man’s ego?” Kungi asked in a now-viral clip, her voice calm but pointed.
Her question struck a chord because it touches on a deeply entrenched idea: in many African households, a man’s value has historically been measured by his ability to provide.
@thecitymakoti
Everything I do has a purpose.. and this is exactly the conversation I wanted us to have ♥️
♬ original sound – TheCityMakoti | Anika Dambuza
Historical context: provision as a measure of masculinity
For decades, South African men were often physically removed from homes by migrant labor systems, leaving financial contribution as the primary—or only—measure of worth. Unemployment, changing economic landscapes, and the rise of women in industries like digital entrepreneurship have disrupted this traditional dynamic.
Kungi’s story reflects this shift. She earned her first million through TikTok, blending Afrikaans charm with Xhosa culture, greeting fans with “Molweni julle” and referring to her husband as “Umyeni wami.” Her brand, The City Makoti, had already softened skeptics with its cultural fusion and authentic celebration of love. Now, she was introducing a less comfortable truth: financial reality.
“I know a lot of women keep quiet or lie about who the real breadwinner is to protect egos. But a confident man is not embarrassed by his partner’s success and is secure enough to stand beside her,” Kungi said.
Love, respect, and values over money
Kungi was careful to clarify that financial leadership does not equate to household authority.
“Sihle remains Intloko yekhaya, the head of the home. Leadership isn’t only about money. It’s about presence, guidance, and covering your family emotionally and spiritually. Being a provider doesn’t make you a good husband. You still have to show up, love your family, and be present. Love has to be felt, not funded.”
Her husband, Sihle, reinforced this publicly:
“Don’t worry about me. Mina’s life is good, and I’m very happy. No fragile masculinity here! So please don’t project your feelings on me.”
@sihledambuza Church fit check. Too blessed to be stressed. #breadwinner 😂😂 @TheCityMakoti | Anika Dambuza ♬ original sound – sihledambuza
Mzansi reacts
The public’s response has been a mix of celebration, curiosity, and criticism. Some fans applauded Kungi’s honesty:
“The backbone of most South African households is the female breadwinner. I have no idea why they’re acting brand new in the comments 😂😂” — @taste_SA
“I swap being the breadwinner with my Xhosa husband depending on who needs rest or a mental health break,” — @ZuluMillenial 🇿🇦
Others were less kind, questioning ego, traditional roles, and public oversharing. Yet beneath the social media chatter lies a deeper reality: many South African women already carry households financially and emotionally, often without recognition.
A new narrative for South African households
Kungi’s confession isn’t about undermining men; it’s about highlighting a society in transition. Female financial leadership is increasingly common, and her openness challenges stereotypes without eroding respect or partnership.
“Female success is not a problem; insecurity is. A home is built on truth, and support is stronger than pretending. The show didn’t create our reality; it reflected it.”
The conversation sparked by Kungi signals something larger: South Africa’s old scripts around masculinity and provision are shifting. Where once financial provision defined a man’s role, partnership, respect, and shared values are now shaping the homes of the future.
Provision built the past. Partnership is building the future.
Source: IOL
Featured Image: Timeout
