Ever felt the urge to smile when you’re falling apart inside? That’s emotional perfectionism creeping in, the silent pressure to always appear “fine,” even when you’re far from it. In a world of curated Instagram stories and relentless positivity posts, the idea that we should have our emotions under control 24/7 is exhausting.
Emotional perfectionism is the internal demand to feel the “right” emotions at the “right” time, all while hiding anything deemed messy, sad, or inconvenient, according to Psychology Today. The publication claims that this form of perfectionism can be deeply harmful, leading to chronic stress, emotional suppression, and even burnout. It’s the invisible weight that convinces people they need to be unbothered and upbeat, all the time.
The National Library of Medicine links emotional suppression to higher risks of anxiety, depression, and physical issues like headaches or digestive troubles. Bottling things up may seem functional at first, but those feelings don’t just disappear; they simmer beneath the surface.
True emotional health means allowing space for all feelings, even the ones that make us squirm. Sadness, frustration, even boredom, they all serve a purpose. Letting ourselves feel, instead of constantly performing emotional perfection, is not weakness. It’s human, because as cliche as it may sound, it’s really okay not to be okay.
Instead of aiming for emotional flawlessness, the healthier goal is emotional honesty. That could mean saying no without guilt, admitting when you’re not okay, or even crying in the shower without labelling it as failure, states Psych Central.
We live in a culture obsessed with “good vibes only,” but real well-being comes from embracing the full range of human experience. You’re allowed to not be okay. You’re allowed to feel it all, and still be enough exactly as you are.
Also see: Balance your job and your joy with these easy tips
