This one is for both the ladies and gents. Have you ever gone on a date with a person that you really like, you guys had fun on the date and you learned how much you two complement each other and in your head, you believe you guys have great chemistry. All that for them to ghost you after and you never hear from them again?
Now you start questioning yourself and try to rewind the whole date to find what exactly could you have done to upset or offend them. I guess people have their personal reasons why they never consider second dates, but what do experts in the field say are the most possible reasons?
Platonic feelings: Psychology Today states that the most common reason this happens is that the other person felt you were all that is needed in a partner and they truly enjoyed your company, but there was simply not enough chemistry. “The overall sense of sexual or romantic attraction was just not there for them. The word “chemistry” is important here, because it is about intangibles, not necessarily specific physical features.”
Too composed: First impressions are always important, and when you go on a first date you try by all means to only show your best side, you want to be seen as this perfect person with no flaws. All this is okay I guess because you obviously want to impress, but I personally feel like if someone picks it up that you were being too fake and not being your genuine self with them, they must not consider you for a second meet-up. The made-up personality might have worked to keep the date alive but it isn’t who you are and other people are just attracted to authenticity.
You talk too much: “If you’re talking the entire time, there’s no room to build a connection,” states the Stellar Hitch publication. The publication further states that the purpose of a date is to communicate and exchange knowledge, so if you are constantly the one talking and give no chance for the other person to express themself, you are definitely not getting the second date.
No effort was made on the outfit: According to Today, not looking date-ready can be a turnoff as much as dressing up too sexily. “Even if you’re rushing straight from the office to your date, at least change your work pants for a cute pair of skinny jeans, and swap out your comfy flats for a cute pair of ankle boots. The same goes for men. If all else fails, at least spray on a (tiny!) bit of a great-smelling cologne.”
Being overly passive or aggressive: The James Preece: The Dating Guru publication suggests that to avoid not being invited for a second date, you need to balance assertiveness and respect for your date’s wants and needs because “Being too passive can give the impression that you lack confidence and initiative, which can be unattractive.” On the other hand, it is stated that you should demonstrate confidence without being overbearing.
Also see: Internet users react to woman who went on a date with her father
