When the time comes for your partner to meet your friends, it should be seen as an important milestone because this is when he is getting to know very intimate people in your life.
Relationship counsellor Thato Monaheng says the milestone can be daunting because we care to different degree about what our friends think of the person we like. But, how much of our friends’ opinion should we be taking into considerations?
By Zukiswa Dlamini
Friendly boundaries. Your friends’ opinion about your relationship should be considered but nothing more. Listening to your friends over yourself is a sign that you don’t trust your own judgement.
SEE ALSO: When it’s time to end a friendship
They could be right. But you are the one who gets the final say. People who find their self- esteem in the approval of their friends will often make decisions that make their friends happy at their own expense.
Looking out for you. One of the reasons why we want our friends to like our partners is because we want to protect ourselves from heartache. We hope that our friends can spot the red flags that romance may be blinding us from seeing. But it doesn’t mean they’re always right or their opinion is the most important. Because they want you to be happy they might have unrealistic expectations. Trust your gut.
SEE ALSO: 5 Signs Of A Genuine Friendship
The balancing act. Remember that even though your friends should be happy for you when you get a new relationship, some of them might see it as a potential threat. Those feelings could lead them to project negatively on your relationship as a way of trying to ‘win you back’.
Getting along too well. While in some instances your friends and your new man don’t get along at all, in some instances they might get along so well that it makes you uncomfortable. This may happen and it can make you feel insecure. In that case you need to set clear boundaries.
